Sharing Each Other's Life
If you are worried about making your relationship work and you don’t know what else to do you likely just need to focus on one thing, communication. If you do not have a good amount of communication in your relationship then your relationship is likely on the brink of disaster. The aspect of communication that is likely to be missing in your relationship is actually listening. Asking questions. Getting a feel for what the love of your life is going through every day. It is important to note that the average couple communicates on average ONLY 12 minutes a day. This includes all forms of communication like texting, email, cell phones, etc. No wonder you can drift apart. You can turn this all around. Think back to the days when you talked all night long. Find a happy medium where you are listening and interested in each other’s lives every day.
What are the three main things that kill communication in a relationship?
1. Stress at work kills the communication level of a relationship because the person being stressed at work shuts down and the other person gets frustrated. Say you are getting stressed out at work and come home with the “don’t talk to me” attitude, your spouse gets angry and before you know it insults are being exchanged.
2. Infidelity, or the appearance of infidelity, is a great communication killer due to the effect it has on the pride of both partners. The person being accused of infidelity will become tired of being accused and get frustrated, while the person doing the accusing begins to feel alienated and embarrassed.
3. Disagreement over having kids will kill the communication in a relationship and make it seem as if partners are on opposite sides of the world. If you want a baby and your partner does not, it will make your communication suffer and eventually could end your relationship. Remember that your partner has a completely different perspective on a situation as you do. Don’t take offense to that . It is a different way of looking at things as you do. Open up the communication with asking about the way they look at having children, for instance, then really listen with an open heart and mind. The give back your perspective on the subject. Do not attack the way your partner looked at that subject just speak from your perspective only. Then ask what they think would be best for the two of you. Then give your input as to what would be best for the relationship. That way you have both been heard. The communication is open and the focus is on the subject not the words where you feel defensive or unheard.
What do you think?
