When She Uses The Word D-I-V-O-R-C-E
Just thinking about a divorce can make even the strongest man fall to his knees in disbelief. Its not that you are not strong. It’s not as if you didn’t make any mistakes in your relationship. You know that you did. It’s just that you never thought things would end. Especially in such a final, formal way. Oh sure sometimes you didn’t listen, you forgot to keep your promises, and you were too busy at times too. You also knew that things were less than ideal for both of you. But you stuck it out.
Now it seems as if your whole world is falling apart. You are losing your best friend and confidant. Something is gone. You don’t feel the same inside. You are fearful of what will come next. You were caught off guard.
The thing is that unless one of you had said no more . . .nothing could ever change. There would be the same arguments. Same problems. Same distance in your relationship.
When you first get the news that she wants a divorce don’t panic or ignore the meaning behind the words. Instead take action. The action you need to take is to get back to the strongest you possible. Don’t freeze. Move forward. Absolutely no pleading and begging. That won’t work. If you stop and think about it, you have a unique opportunity right now to get to the source of all the discontent. Believe me when I tell you that is yet to come.
For now it is time to find out what was happening to you. What are your thoughts about the relationship. This is your perspective. Don’t discuss your perspective with her. You are formulating your perspective, your point of view. All the while you are picking yourself up and moving forward in the direction of change and most importantly hope. Never give up. I tell all the men that I coach, that it is not over till it is over. The story has not ended.
I never give up hope for a marriage. I know that things can be repaired and made even better than before. For now have hope. Hope for what is to come. Hope to add to the story of the two of you in a better way. Hope for love. Hope for you.
Now every day make the decision to
