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Having Fun as a Part of Your Relationship

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Making Time For Fun With The One You Love

The Ups And Downs Of Love

There is always going to be something to stress you out or something to make you worry about what is coming tomorrow, but having fun as a part of your relationship should never be forgotten.  I don’t have to cite the endless amount of studies that show the relaxing and comforting feeling that fun has on the human psyche to convince you.  Having fun as a part of your relationship should be the cornerstone to everything you do.

When you go to the store you can incorporate having fun as a part of your relationship by picking out new things to eat that may spark a memory or fun feeling.  You can guess the cost of the grocery bill and the winner gets spoils or the loser is penalized in some way. Plan a spontaneous adventure like a picnic at the park. Leave love notes in the car. Plan a date night. Light the candles. Have a camp out in the backyard for the two of you. Be creative.

Having fun as a part of your relationship is not just something you should do at the movies or the amusement park, anyone can have fun there.  If you see having fun as a part of your relationship when you are going to the doctor or driving to work in the morning are then you will be happy for the rest of your life together with your partner. Change your focus to what can I do to make this moment fun and exciting instead of focusing on the problems. You can’t imagine what a difference this will make on the way your relationship works. The focus becomes the two of you going through life with fun and celebration for the moments that you share together.

It can’t be stressed enough the impact that having fun as a part of your relationship can have on every aspect of your life.

What ideas do you have for spending time together ?

Communication and Your Relationship

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Listening To The One You Love

Sharing Each Other's Life

If you are worried about making your relationship work and you don’t know what else to do you likely just need to focus on one thing, communication.  If you do not have a good amount of communication in your relationship then your relationship is likely on the brink of disaster.  The aspect of communication that is likely to be missing in your relationship is actually listening. Asking questions. Getting a feel for what the love of your life is going through every day. It is important to note that the average couple communicates on average ONLY 12 minutes a day. This includes all forms of communication like texting, email, cell phones, etc.  No wonder you can drift apart. You can turn this all around.  Think back to the days when you talked all night long. Find a happy medium where you are listening and interested in each other’s lives every day.

What are the three main things that kill communication in a relationship?

1.  Stress at work kills the communication level of a relationship because the person being stressed at work shuts down and the other person gets frustrated.  Say you are getting stressed out at work and come home with the “don’t talk to me” attitude, your spouse gets angry and before you know it insults are being         exchanged.

2.   Infidelity, or the appearance of infidelity, is a great communication killer due to the effect it has on the pride of both partners.  The person being accused of  infidelity will become tired of being accused and get frustrated, while the person doing the accusing begins to feel alienated and embarrassed.

3.   Disagreement over having kids will kill the communication in a relationship and make it seem as if partners are on opposite sides of the world.  If you want a baby and your  partner does not, it will make your communication suffer and eventually could end your relationship. Remember that your partner has a  completely different perspective on a situation as you do. Don’t take offense to that . It is a different way of looking at things as you do. Open up the communication with asking about the way they look at having children, for instance, then really listen with an open heart and mind.  The give back your perspective on the subject. Do not attack the way your partner looked at that subject just speak from your perspective only.  Then ask what they think would be best for the two of you. Then give your input as to what would be best for the relationship.  That way you have both been heard. The communication is open and the focus is on the subject not the words where you feel defensive or unheard.

What do you think?

Finding Intimacy and Connection in a Relationship

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A Loving Connection

An Intimate Love

The main reason that most relationships fall apart, and a large reason that many end in infidelity, is that people lose intimacy and connection in a relationship.  It is not a given that everyone will have intimacy and connection in a relationship and just because you have it now doesn’t mean that you will have it later on as the years go by.

If you fear that you are losing intimacy and connection in your relationship one of the first things that you should do is take a break.  Not necessarily a break from each other, but a break from the things in your life that are keeping you distracted and disconnected.  Intimacy and connection in a relationship are hard to have if you don’t have any time together.

One of the things that you will hear from those who have lost the intimacy and connection in their relationship is that they don’t really even like themselves.  They begin to feel unhappy and lost and feel really unloved.  They can’t quite figure out that it is what they are putting out their to their partner is  a needy and negative message. Any good psychologist will tell you that it is almost impossible to have intimacy and connection in a relationship if there is not a love of one’s self from both people in the relationship.

Though it may seem like it is impossible for you to find intimacy and connection in your relationship you may just need to work on the things above to make everything change.  Don’t give up on the possibility of having intimacy and connection in a relationship, with just a little time and effort you can make it happen for yourself. You can have ta very connected and intimate relationship.

How to Have a Happy Marriage

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alt="happier marriage"Simple Things You Can Do and Say To Have A Happy Marriage

Many people fear the institution of marriage because they believe that it takes major things to make a marriage work and they don’t know how to have a happy marriage.  The truth is that you can avoid many things that would normally make your relationship suffer by being aware and kind.  Are you afraid of not knowing how to have a happy marriage?

Here are three things to do to help you have a happy marriage:

  1. Reinforce to your spouse on a regular and consistent basis that they are worthy of your immense love and they are the center of your world.  Marriage is a large commitment and part of how to have a happy marriage is centered in complimenting your partner.
  2. Understand that sometimes the secret to how to have a happy marriage lies in those things on the side of your head, your ears.  Sometimes your spouse just wants you to listen and if you do that then your spouse will feel heard and validated.
  3. The most ignored principle to how to have a happy marriage is the idea of having a “state of the relationship” discussion every now and then.  Ask yourselves how you are doing and what you can do to make your relationship better for the long term. How do you make your relationship a priority? What do you want from your relationship?

    What are some things that you do every day to have a happy relationship? What does this relationship mean to YOU?  Where do you want to be in 5 years as a couple? What can you celebrate today that you have accomplished as a couple? What motivates you to have a happy marriage? What can you say today to your spouse to create  a happy marriage?

    Marriage Do's

    Happily Ever After

Marriage Intensives

Sometimes you get to a place in your marriage where you know you need help. I suggest that you consider attending a 3-Day Marriage Intensive. You willget much farther than one hour a week and be able to dig deeper into what changes can turn your marriage around. Call to discuss your situaltion today to know if a marriage intensive will help you.

Have you been betrayed by your spouses’s affair?

Any type of betrayal is devastating. Affairs are particularly painful for many reasons. You feel violtaed and hurt. Affairs cause the very foundation your marriage is built on to be shaky and the future seems very uncertain. I will help you through the devastation. Find out how - contact me today.

Couples Seminars, Workshops, and Retreats

alt-"Marriage Workshop" Couples thrive in a learning environment with other couples. Couples Workshops are delivered through half day seminars, full day workshops, and couples's weekend retreats throughout the year.
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